I happened to come across one of my older blog posts from about 9 years ago. I remember having written that piece, but when I started reading it now, I could not believe having written a few sentences in it. Those sentences sounded silly and childish and frivolous. Did I really write those? I must have! But for me, as a person, I can't relate to it anymore. That is the power of "time" and how time changes us as we age.
Since I have been on blogging platform for long, I have been writing and sharing thoughts on many social issues over many years. On many of these topics, my opinion now is starkly different than what used to be earlier. It is pretty normal and must be happening with everyone as we age. But, on a level, it is scary too. If my opinion on something 10 years ago was not "final"; is my opinion "now" also not final? Will I keep changing and evolving with time even further? On this note, are we even "one person" in our life?
The thought is even more scary if we think about others. It is likely that in our life we must have discarded or judged some people harshly. What if that person has also changed with time and now the person is no longer like he or she used to be, say 10 years ago? We can say, "who cares?" and move on; but on one level, it does not look okay!
We have been told that looking back in life is mostly unproductive and risky. But, if we are changing with time 'unconsciously', will it not create problems for us? At times, it may be a good idea to have a look at how we have changed over time. For that, looking back may be necessary.
At the same time, it is also comforting that we do not entirely change. A lot of my thoughts, values and habits are still the same as before. But a lot has changed. I think when it comes to opinions and my understanding of this world, there are more changes than what has remained the same. But when it comes to the "inner me", things have remained the same more times than the changes. So, we may be really "one person" after all!
On a serious note, this phenomenon of us changing with time presents good as well as bad opportunities. I know I am no longer as disciplined as I used to be in my teenage and I would love to be like that again. I also sometimes recall how motivated I used to be earlier, in contrast to what I am now. Life experiences make, break or change us, for the better or the worse. It is part of nature's 'grand design'.
When it comes to linear time, we may always think that the "youthful us" were the "best ever us"! I think I would agree with this thought. Even if we become wiser with age and can understand more aspects of any subject than we did earlier, there is something very magical in the teenage years which we shall always cherish. If asked to choose between wisdom and youth, I guess a lot of people will choose the latter over the former, even though the former may be more useful and beneficial for us. Perhaps there is something interesting in being "foolishly young", and one can't be without the other.
To the time gone by; and to the time ahead of us. With a secret wish that somehow it does not come after all.
- Rahul Tiwary
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