Showing posts with label society. Show all posts
Showing posts with label society. Show all posts

Thursday, May 29, 2025

A Toy Giraffe and Happy Kids

 

On my way to the office, there's a stretch of road where many nomadic families live in makeshift tent homes along the roadside. They also run shops, mainly selling “toys”. At first, I found it interesting that they had chosen selling “toys” as their business, but after a while it became clear. They have got a little army of their own kids!

I have never cared to scrutinize them, but I see only a few of the men near their shops/tents, perhaps many go out for other vocations. And the women are not seen too, perhaps busy cooking in the backside of their tents. But the children are always jumping around that whole area.

One fine day, I noticed that a man had bought a soft toy “giraffe” from their shop and was trying to put it on his motorbike to carry it home. The “giraffe” was big: like at least two feet tall! I had never seen a giraffe as a toy, and I could never imagine why someone would buy a “giraffe” for a kid. There are all sorts of other popular animals, like elephants, tigers, lions, deer, dogs; all these are popular in the soft toys category. But the man, who was in his late 60s, had bought a giraffe! I remember imagining that a kid was going to be very happy that day, while I passed by.

Another interesting popular thing they are seen selling is “inflatable kiddie pool”. Made of PVC, these can be inflated, and after being filled with water, small kids can sit or play in it. I never saw any such interesting things in my childhood.

Coming back to those nomads. Sometimes I wonder if our world is going in the right direction or wrong. We have people like MS Dhoni or Abhishek Bachchan who got only one kid each, while they can afford to give fabulous lives to a dozen. And on the other hand, we have these nomads and poor people who got no life of their own and their children play in the dirt whole day, but they keep producing children like the world is going to end tomorrow if they don’t. Our Prime Minister wants to make India a developed country A.S.A.P., and our main opposition party wants to do “wealth redistribution” in society. All the while, these poor families keep producing armies of offsprings every year.

Well, I do not have any problem with these kids. They are always nice, and it is always nice to see kids around. It is what they are going to turn out to be after they grow up, worries me. At some level, I think our world would have been a lovely place if kids were going to only play with toy giraffes or inflatable pools. But at some point, they are going to get old and need livelihood and means to contribute to the society. I don’t know how many roadsides they will be able to keep capturing every year, for their tent-houses and toy shops.

I know that in such moments we need to introspect instead of pointing fingers. But at some point, we are going to end both introspecting and finger pointing, and like everything else, we shall vanish in the thin air. At that point, it will not be about what we thought or did, it will be more about what happened or got done by the collective us, while we were around. In the shadow of these thoughts, I find myself feeling more powerless than I ever have before.

- Rahul

Monday, June 21, 2021

'Papa Takle Ho Gaye'

 

There is a neighborhood kid of about 6 who used to play with me a lot. He was visiting our home after a few weeks. I had recently colored my hair, hence I showed it to him and asked him how did my grey hair turn into total black? He did not reply. After repeating the question and making him recall how my hair had lots of whites earlier, he finally said that he did not know how it turned back. I realized that he had not noticed my hair; whether grey or white! It reminded me of another incident.

My kids were seeing me after a long gap. My daughter was about 3.5. I went to get a hair cut and as soon as I returned home, she came, noticed me, and said, “Papa takle ho gaye”, pointing to my short hair! She had not only noticed that I had a haircut, but she had also noticed that I had short hair now! Plus, she thought to share her observation with me. I was really impressed with her intelligence as well as thoughtfulness. And somewhere, it was also got to do with gender. My son did not notice my haircut at all!

At any given age, we can notice in small children that most of the times girls are cleverer than boys. Their minds work in slightly different manner than boys. We can notice the differences in the way they choose toys or express themselves. Now, imagine a society which tries to raise boys and girls in the same manner! Will that be called feminism? By all means, it will cause harm to both boys and girls. We need not force our gender-righteousness on our kids. Let girls be ‘girly’ and boys be like ‘boys’ if their natural inclinations are showing in that manner. Let us not force them to behave and be the “same”.

Thoughts triggered by the kind of news media outlets expose to me these days.

- Rahul Tiwary


Monday, June 7, 2021

Article: Femininity is Fragile

I came across a writeup and found it really interesting. I am sharing some portions of it here in this blog post. At the end of the writeup, two web links are given, to explore more from the author.

This is just for reflections. I am sure you would find many of these relatable with someone you know, or even with your life experiences.

***

You pay for the sins of every guy that ** her up before you met her. Her father, her ex etc.

Because the trauma from her suffering typically overshadows the wisdom from her experiences.

Women do not improve with use. They deteriorate.

Deep down everybody knows this.

This is why being the first love of a woman of a good father is the best shot you'll ever have.

This is why traditionally women were married off young as virgins.

Because women are fragile, and as they accumulate experience they accumulate trauma that ruins them for romance.

The feminine is not built for stress. It is the masculine that is forged through the traumas of suffering, not the feminine. Women who actively have to work on being feminine aren't ascending to a higher stage, they're trying to get back something they had but lost to suffering.

The feminine is in its natural state, complete. The same cannot be said for the masculine. The masculine undergoes a journey which requires the integration of the shadow and the shedding and loss of innocence to truly self-actualise. Women attempting the same journey will implode.

There is no man you would truly consider a man who hasn't paid a trip to hell. Those are the fees we pay. That's the cost of being man. A woman who went to hell is a shadow of her former self because hell destroys femininity. Which is why it strengthens men and destroys women.

Not every man survives hell. The weak ones suicide, or become sociopathic - highly emotional, unbalanced and destructive men who lash out at everything aggressively in the same way your typical feminist woman does.

But men *CAN* make the trip and be better for it.

Women cannot.

***

Men do "need to get in touch with their softer side" but not until they've been to hell, survived, made peace with it and come out the other end free of resentment and bitterness, but fortified by their experiences into a man.

And its a good woman's love that brings that out.

The reason for this is simple. If you've been to hell, you became a monster to beat a monster, and if you're not careful, that monster will possess you (sociopathy). Connecting with your softer side is thus a counterbalance to the evil that lurks within you and helps centre you.

***

Femininity is fragile and easily snuffed out.

Warm eyes, a coy stare, a gentle smile, a general cheeriness, a shy giggle, modesty, grace and a pure heart - when's the last time you observed the captivating beauty of healthy femininity?

That's what's hard to cultivate & easily snuffed out. Their spiritual beauty is fragile.

And when they lose their spiritual beauty, all that remains is their quasi impersonation of the masculine, and the negative elements of the feminine.

And you know what this looks like, because you've met plenty of feminists.

They are all damaged, failed women.

It's very sad.

***

If you enjoyed this thread, you can find more than 60 others freely available at http://threads.tellyoursonthis.com

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Thanks for reading!

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Cousin Vs Bhai

In a train journey I came across families of two brothers traveling together. Elder brother and his wife had two beautiful sons and younger brother had one son who was slightly behind in growth. Younger brother was apparently richer in wealth and elder brother was certainly simpler by nature, if I could guess by watching them. Younger brother’s wife was not so kind towards elder brother’s wife, and sent hidden taunts and veiled ridicules. Then at one point elder brother told them that he had booked a car. “Which car?” younger brother was obviously surprised and curious. When he heard, “Maruti Ciaz” which costs around 9 lakhs, he was confused. “Bhaiya log have booked Ciaz”, he informed his wife and then there was a silence…

There is no scene as ugly as two brothers not behaving warmly. But then they were adults! What happened between their children was even more interesting.

Younger (and richer) brother’s son who behaved freaky very often, was being avoided by elder brother’s two sons. So his mother who was street-smart, thought to proactively do something about it. She said to the older kid, “he is also your brother. You should take care of him”.

What the boy replied shocked me. He said, “he is only my cousin” (wo mera cousin hai).

“But cousin also means 'chachera bhai', so you are still brothers!”

The boy now got visibly irritated and said, “When did I say he is not my brother?”, and then he looked away, stopping that line of conversation.

I remembered our childhood. We had so many cousins and we always introduced them as "bhai" to our friends. It was so confusing to kids counting how many brothers one could have, so they used to ask back, "is he your ‘real’ brother?" (‘apna’ bhai?) And then we learnt to say "chachera bhai" or ‘mamera bhai’. But we were still "bhai". We picked up the term "cousin" very late, only when it was impossible to not pick it up...

- Rahul

Monday, January 27, 2014

Out in the cold

While we enjoy winter and its chill; there are people who struggle to survive through its every moment. The same divine flame illuminates their souls too; and they were also born with same blood, flesh and bones. It's moments like these when you realize how heaven and hell both are in front of us - some of us have privilege by birth, some by karma, yet there are some others who fight every night in the cold to keep their flame of hope burning...

I read this article and could not stop tears from coming out of my eyes: